Friends don't let friends take home ugly men.
--Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE.

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?"
- Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia.

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her crap.
-Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina

Make love, not war. Hell, do both, get married!
-Women's restroom, The Filling Station, Bozeman, Montana

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.
-Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas

No wonder you always go home alone.
-Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

Beauty is only a light switch away.
- Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
-The Irish Times, Washington, DC

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
-Written in the dust on the back of a bus, Flagstaff, Arizona.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
- Revolution Books, New York, New York

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
-Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Please don't throw your cigarette butts in the urinal. It makes them soggy and hard to light.
-The Janitor

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
-Men's restroom