Good Luck Mr. Gorsky

On July 20, 1969, as commander of the Apollo 11 Lunar Module, Neil Armstrong was the first person to set foot on the moon. His first words after stepping on the moon "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind," were televised to Earth and heard by millions.

But just before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark "Good Luck Mr. Gorsky".

Many people at NASA thought it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet cosmonaut. However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs.

Over the years, many people questioned Armstrong as to what the "Good Luck Mr. Gorsky" statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.

On July 5, 1995 in Tampa Bay, Florida, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year-old question to Armstrong. This time, he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had died, so Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

In 1938 when he was a kid in a small Midwest town, he was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. His friend hit the ball, which landed in his neighbor's yard by the bedroom windows.. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick up the ball, young Armstrong heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky...

"Sex! You want Sex?! You'll get sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

A woman walks into a Lexus dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it.

As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now. But, as luck would have it, there standing next to her is a salesman.

"Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?"

Very uncomfortably, she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"

He answers, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that if you farted just touching it... you're going to shit when you hear the price."