Rejected Valentine Card Romantic Lines

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother...

Roses are red, violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,
the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head...

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face...

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot.
This describes everything you are not...

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face...

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Wow, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you really messed up my life...

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming...

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime...

Discoveries

Man discovered weapons, invented hunting.
Woman discovered hunting, invented furs.

Man discovered colors, invented painting.
Woman discovered painting, invented make-up.

Man discovered speech, invented conversation.
Woman discovered conversation, invented gossip.

Man discovered agriculture, invented food.
Woman discovered food, invented diet.

Man discovered friendship, invented love.
Woman discovered love, invented marriage.

Man discovered woman, invented sex.
Woman discovered sex, invented headache.

Man discovered trade, invented money.
Woman discovered money, man was all fucked up after that.

How To Say 'I love You' In Different Languages

English.........I Love You
Albanian........Une Te Dua
Arabic..........Ana Bhibbik
Catalan.........Testimo Molt
Chinese.........Wo Ai Ni
Eskimo..........Nagligivaget
Finnish.........Mina Rakkastan Sinua
French..........Je T'aime
German..........Ich Liebe Dich
Greek...........S'Agapo
Hawaiian........Aloha Wau la Oe
Hebrew..........Ani Ohev Otakh
Hungarian.......Se Ret Lay
Irish...........Thaim In Grabh Leat
Italian.........Ti Amo
Japanese........Ai Shite Imasu
Maltese.........ien Inhobbok
Persian.........Du Stet Daram
Romanian........Te iubesc
Russian.........Ya Lyublyu Tyebya
Spanish.........Te Amo
Swedish.........Jag Alskar Dig
Turkish.........Seni Seviyorum