Words of Wisdom

• Behind Every Successful Woman Is Herself
• Oh My God, I Think I'm Becoming The Man I Wanted To Marry!
• Ginger Rogers Did Everything Fred Astaire Did, But She Did It Backwards And In High Heels
• A Woman Is Like A Tea Bag...You Don't Know How Strong She Is Until You Put Her In Hot Water
• I Have Yet To Hear A Man Ask For Advice On How To Combine Marriage And A Career
• So Many Men, So Few Who Can Afford Me Coffee, Chocolate, Men ... Some Things Are Just Better Rich
• Don't Treat Me Any Differently Than You Would The Queen
• I'm Out Of Estrogen And I Have A Gun
• Warning: I Have An Attitude And I Know How To Use It
• Of Course I Don't Look Busy...I Did It Right The First Time
• Do Not Start With Me. You Will Not Win
• All Stressed Out And No One To Choke
• I Can Be One Of Those Bad Things That Happens To Bad People
• How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
• Don't Upset Me! I'm Running Out Of Places To Hide The Bodies
• And Last But Not Least: If You Want Breakfast In Bed, Sleep In The Kitchen

An Act of Wisdom
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:

Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen.

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.

The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, pay the bills and balance the check book. He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog. Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home. Set out cookies and milk and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing. At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed. At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love which he managed to get through without complaint.

The next morning he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said, "Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please let us trade back."

The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied, "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night."