Hillary's First Night as President
Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this.

FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her, and Hillary says, 'How can I best serve my country?'

Washington says, 'Never tell a lie.'

'Ouch!' Says Hillary, 'I don't know about that.'

SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears. Hillary says, 'How can I best serve my country?'

Jefferson says, 'Listen to the people.'

'Ohhh! I really, really don't want to do that.'

THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears. Hillary says, 'How can I best serve my country?'

Lincoln says, 'Go to the theater.'

Little Billy
Little Billy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.

When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to President Bush. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send Billy a $5.00 bill.

President Bush thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

Billy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to God, which read: Dear God, Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those crooks deducted $95.00.
Thanks, Billy

The Kyoto Accord
The Kyoto Accord went into effect this week, forcing 35 nations and the European Union to cut emissions in an effort to combat global warming. The U.S., the worlds biggest polluter, was not a participant. President Bush refused to sign it. I really don't think he understands the thing.

For instance, when they asked him in Europe today if he cared to comment about the Kyoto Accord, President Bush said he much prefers the Camry."

The Flip-Side of All The Clinton Zingers: Top political slogans of 2007
(On an infant's shirt): Already smarter than Bush

1/20/09: End of an Error

That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway

Let's Fix Democracy in THIS Country First

If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran

Bush Like a Rock. Only Dumber.

You Can't Be Pro-War And Pro-Life At The Same Time

If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President

Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant

Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?

George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight

Impeachment: It's Not Just for Blowjobs Anymore

America: One Nation, Under Surveillance

They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It

Which God Do You Kill For?

Cheney/Satan '08

Jail to the Chief

Who Would Jesus Torture?

No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade

Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap

Bad president! No Banana.

We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language

We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them

Rich Man's War, Poor Man's Blood

Is It Vietnam Yet?

Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either

Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Hand Basket?

You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.

Frodo Failed. Bush Has the Ring.

Impeach Cheney First

Dubya, Your Dad Shoulda Pulled Out, Too

When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46

The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century

"Apparently I am someone whose mind resembles nothing so much as a bunch of clowns in a pie fight."