Least Romantic Sayings
"You're The Cheez Wiz on my potato."

"Being without you is like a biscuit without gravy."

"I need you like someone with the squirts needs Pepto Bismol."

"You make me so excited, I just can't hold my bladder."

"I wanna be close to you like a leech on an abrasion."

"I want you like a dog wants a muscular leg."

"You mean more to me than a Buy one, Get one Free Coupon at Waffle House."

"I want you more than a Romulan wants to kill a Klingon."

"I want you more than the nastiest heroin addict needs a fix from a dirty needle."

"Its either you or the dog but I gotta sleep with someone tonight!"

Most Romantic Lines from New English Language Students
I fell in love with her the first time I sawed her.

He had such a worm heart.

We were two sheeps passing in the night.

We have hated each other for so long. I want to borrow the hatchet.

My dentist makes me blush twice a day.

I don't know if he will propose, but I am expecting.

I have something exciting to tell you. My girlfriend and I got enraged last night!

The groom was wearing a very nice croissant.

He lifted the veal off her face and gave her a big kiss.

I think she is really glad she got marinated.

More/Other Mistakes from New English Language Students
Recipes: Next, chop all the vegetarians into little pieces.

Health: It is dangerous to smoke while you are becoming pregnant.

Sports: It was so exciting to watch! The cheerleaders threw up high into the air.

Politics: The President got off the plane and gave a big kiss to the first ladder.

Grammar: Should I have a coma in the middle of this sentence?

Music: When he was through singing he had a standing ovulation.

Food: Do you like this food? I made it from scratching!

Parents: My bed has three blankets and a large guilt my parents gave me.

Weather: Rain makes old cars lust. So be careful about that. Once a car starts lusting, there's no way to stop it!

Travel: You can't sleep with me because it is too crowded. But you can probably sleep with my sister. That's what most of my friends do when they visit.