Cats
"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."

"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten this." –

"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow."

"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."

"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."

"One cat just leads to another."

"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later."

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."

"People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life."

"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats."

"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."

"No heaven will not ever Heaven be; unless my cats are there to welcome me."

"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."

"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."

"Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God."

"Time spent with cats is never wasted."

"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True and they have many other fine qualities as well."

"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats."

"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want."

"I got rid of my husband.
The cat was allergic."

"My husband said it was him or the cat ...
I miss him sometimes."

"Cats aren't clean; they're just covered with cat spit."

"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer."