It was a Sunday afternoon, and Ray had rushed down to the local supermarket to hurriedly pick up some hamburger rolls, chips and a few condiments. The big college game was going to be on, so he was having a few friends over to watch it.

The store was loaded with shoppers and as he headed for the six item express lane, the only one that didn't have a long line, a woman completely ignoring the overhead sign slipped into the check-out line just in front of him pushing a cart piled high with groceries.

Ray was quietly fuming at the anticipated delay. But the elderly cashier beckoned the woman to come forward, looked into the cart and asked ever so sweetly, "So Dearie, which six items would you like to buy?"

A Mexican, new to the US, needed new socks. In the clothing store, he managed to convey through sign language that he needed something, but not what. The clerk took him around, showing him their stock: shirts, pants, ties, hats, but each time the Mexican shook his head "No." Finally, they reached the socks. The Mexican nodded vigorously and said, "¡Eso sí que es!" The clerk said angrily, "Well why didn't you just spell it in the first place!?"

A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"

The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing.

The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"

Again, the clerk doesn't answer him.

The guy asks several more times: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"

And the clerk just seems to ignore him.

Finally, the guy storms off in anger.

The customer who was waiting in line behind the guy asks the clerk, "Why wouldn't you answer that guy's question?"

The clerk answers, "D-d-d-do you th-th-th-think I w-w-w-want to get b-b-b-beat up?!!"

Top Questions Most Often Asked At A 99-Cent Store
"How much is this?"

"Is this necklace real gold?"

"Do these Tampa Bay Devil Rays sweatshirts come in medium?"

"So let me get this straight -- everything here is 99 cents?"

"How much is this?"

"Do you have anything nicer for $1.99?"

"How much is this 'Best of Ray Stevens' CD?"

"Didn't this used to be a White Castle?"

"Do you have change for a dollar bill?"

"Can someone go to the bank and get more pennies?"