The
Hearing Aid
A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid.
It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."
"Really," answered the neighbor.
"What kind is it?"
"Twelve thirty."
The Five Secrets of a Perfect Relationship
- It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks and cleans from time to time, and has a job.
- It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
- It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.
- It's important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
- It's very, very important that these four women don't know each other.
Which Would You Choose?
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the bus:
- An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
- An old friend who once saved your life.
- The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car?
Think before you continue reading... This is a moral / ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first. Or, you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He simply answered: "I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations. Never forget to "Think Outside of the Box."
However, The correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her out of her misery, have sex with the perfect partner against the bus stop, then drive off with the old friend for some beers.
The
Perfect Man
The preacher said: "There's no such thing as a perfect woman. Anybody
present who has ever known a perfect woman, stand up."
Nobody stood up.
"Those who have ever known a perfect man, stand up."
One demure little man stood up.
"Did you ever know an absolutely perfect man?" he asked, somewhat disbelieving.
"I didn't know him personally," replied the little man, "but I have heard a great deal about him. He was my wife's first husband."
